(Share) "ROI"

One day old man Stumpy and his wife Martha went to the Illinois State Fair. 

There is this man selling plane rides in his single prop show plane for $10 per person. 

Stumpy looks to Martha and says, "Martha, I think I really should try that." 

Martha replies, "I know you want to Stumpy, but we have a lot of bills, and you know the money is tight, and $10 is $10." So Stumpy goes without. 

Over the next few years they return every year, and the same thing, Stumpy wants to ride, but Martha says no money.

Finally, when Stumpy and Martha are both about 70 years old, Stumpy looks to Martha, and says, "Martha, I'm 70 now, and I don't know if I'll ever get the chance again, so I just have to have a ride in that there airplane." Martha replies in the same old fashion, and Stumpy kind of slumps down. 

A young student pilot is standing near by and overhears the conversation...

The pilot pipes up, "Excuse me folks, I couldn't help but hear your situation, and I have a deal for you"

" I'll take both of you up together, and if you can both make the entire trip without saying a word, or even making the slightest sound, I'll give the ride for free. But if either of you make a sound, its $10 each." 

Well, Martha and Stumpy look at each other, and agree to take the ride.The pilot takes them up, and starts to do loop de loops, twists, dives, climbs and spins. 

No sound. 

The pilot lands the plane, looks back at Stumpy and says, "Sir, I have to hand it to ya, you didn't make even the slightest sound and that was my best stuff." 

Stumpy looks back at the pilot and says, "Well, I was gonna say something when Martha fell out, but $10 is $10!"

Moral of the Story : As you sow , so shall you reap .

(Real) "Core human problems"

I was trying to get something like this from long :

(Share) "The economics class"

 An economics professor at a  local college made a statement that he had never  failed a single student before, but had recently  failed an entire class.

That class had insisted that  Obama's socialism worked and that no one would be poor  and no one would be rich, a great equalizer.  

The professor then said, "OK, we will have an  experiment in this class on Obama's plan".

All grades  will be averaged and everyone will receive the same  grade so no one will fail and no one will receive an  A.... (substituting grades for dollars - something  closer to home and more readily understood by  all).

After the first test, the grades were  averaged and everyone got a B. 

The students who  studied hard were upset and the students who studied  little were happy. 

As the second test rolled around,  the students who studied little had studied even less  and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a  free ride too so they studied little. 

The  second test average was a D! No one was happy.  

When the 3rd test rolled  around, the average was an F. 

As the tests  proceeded, the scores never increased as bickering,  blame and name-calling all resulted in hard feelings  and no one would study for the benefit of anyone else. 

To their great surprise, ALL FAILED and the  professor told them that socialism would also  ultimately fail because when the reward is great, the  effort to succeed is great, but when government takes  all the reward away, no one will try or want to  succeed.

Moral of the story :
5. When half of  the people get the idea that they do not have to work  because the other half is going to take care of them,  and when the other half gets the idea that it does no  good to work because somebody else is going to get  what they work for, that is the beginning of the end  of any nation.

(Share) "The tomato story"

A Jobless man applied for the position of 'office boy' at Microsoft.

 The HR manager interviewed him then watched him cleaning the floor as a test.'You are employed' he said.

Give me your e-mail address and I'll send you the application to fill in, as well as date when you may start.

The man replied 'But I don't have a computer, neither an email'.                                       'I'm sorry', said the HR manager.                                                                                                   

If you don't have an email, that means you do not exist.         

And who doesn't exist, cannot have the job.  

'The man left with no hope at all. He didn't know what to do, with only $10 in his pocket.. 

He then decided to go to the supermarket and buy a 10Kg tomato crate. 

He then sold the tomatoes in a door to door round. In less than two hours,he succeeded to double his capital. He repeated the operation three times,and returned home with $60.

The man realized that he can survive by this way, and started to go everyday earlier, and return late. 

Thus, his money doubled or tripled everyday. Shortly, he bought a cart, then a truck, and then he had his own fleet of delivery vehicles.

5 years later, the man is one of the biggest food retailers in the US .

He started to plan his family's future, and decided to have a life insurance.He called an insurance broker, and chose a protection plan.

When the conversation was concluded the broker asked him his email.The man replied,'I don't have an email.'

The broker answered curiously, 'You don't have an email, and yet have succeeded to build an empire. Can you imagine what you could have been if you had an e mail?!!' 

The man thought for a while and replied, 'Yes, I'd be an office boy at Microsoft!'

Moral of the story : 
Moral 1 : Internet is not the solution to your life..
Moral 2 : If you don't have an Internet and work hard, you can be a millionaire.
Moral 3 : If you received this message by email,you are closer to being an office boy/girl, than a millionaire.

P.S : I am closing my Blogger and i am going to sell tomatoes.Please don't disturb !

(Share) "Being Gujarati !"

Why gujjus do well in any field :

Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new Chairman for Microsoft Europe.

5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate is Mr. Patel.

Bill Gates: Thank you for coming. Those who do not know JAVA may leave.

2000 people leave the room.

Mr. Patel says to himself, 'I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to lose if I stay. I'll give it a try'

Bill Gates: Candidates who never had experience of managing more than 100 people may leave.

2000 people leave the room.

Mr. Patel says to himself ' I never managed anybody by myself but I have nothing to lose if I stay. What can happen to me?' So he stays.

Bill Gates: Candidates who do not have management diplomas may leave.

500 people leave the room.

Mr. Patel says to himself, 'I left school at 15 but what have I got to lose?' So he stays in the room..

Lastly, Bill Gates asked the candidates who do not speak Serbo - Croat to leave.

498 people leave the room.

Mr.Patel says to himself, ' I do not speak one word of Serbo - Croat but what do I have to lose?'

So he stays and finds himself with One other candidate. Everyone else has gone.

Bill Gates joined them and said 'Apparently you are the only two candidates who speak Serbo - Croat, so I'd now like to hear you have a conversation together in that language.'

Calmly, Mr. Patel turns to the other candidate and says,

`Kem chho ?

The other candidate answers 'ekdam majaa maa !

Moral of the Story : I love Gujaratis and i am sure you'll too :)

(Share) "Recognition - An evil"

There was a farmer who had a horse and a goat….. 
One day, the horse became ill. So he called the veterinarian, who said: 

"Well, your horse has a virus. He must take this medicine for three days. 
I'll come back on the 3rd day and if he's not better, we're going to have to put him down. 

Nearby, the goat listened closely to their conversation. 

The next day, they gave the horse the medicine and left. 

The goat approached the horse and said: “Be strong, my friend. 
Get up or else they're going to put you to sleep!” 

On the second day, they again gave the horse the medicine and left. 

The goat came back and said: "Come on buddy, get up or else you're going to die! 
Come on, I'll help you get up. Let's go! One, two, three..." 

On the third day, they came to give the horse the medicine and the vet said: 
"Unfortunately, we're going to have to put him down tomorrow. Otherwise,
the virus might spread and infect the other horses". 

After they left, the goat approached the horse and said: "Listen pal, it's now or never! 
Get up, come on! Have courage! Come on! Get up! Get up! That's it, slowly! Great! 
Come on, one, two, three... Good, good. Now faster, come on...... Fantastic! Run, run more! 
Yes! Yay! Yes! You did it, you're a champion...!!!" 

All of a sudden, the owner came back, saw the horse running in the field and began shouting: 
It's a miracle! My horse is cured. We must have a grand party. Let's kill the goat!!!!

The Lesson: 
Nobody truly knows which employee actually deserves the merit of success, or who's actually contributing the necessary support to make things happen. 

Moral of the Story :

LEARNING TO LIVE WITHOUT RECOGNITION IS A 
SKILL!!!! 
AMATEURS BUILT THE ARK [which saved all the species] 
and 
PROFESSIONALS BUILT THE TITANIC [all died tragically]

Patience

A sweet lesson on patience.

A NYC Taxi driver wrote:

I arrived at the address and honked the horn. After waiting a few minutes I honked again. Since this was going to be my last ride of my shift I thought about just driving away, but instead I put the car in park and walked up to the door and knocked.. 'Just a minute', answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor.

After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 90's stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940's movie.

By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets.

There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard
box filled with photos and glassware.

'Would you carry my bag out to the car?' she said. I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman.

She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb.

She kept thanking me for my kindness. 'It's nothing', I told her.. 'I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother to be treated.'

'Oh, you're such a good boy, she said. When we got in the cab, she gave me an address and then asked, 'Could you drive
through downtown?'

'It's not the shortest way,' I answered quickly..

'Oh, I don't mind,' she said. 'I'm in no hurry. I'm on my way to a hospice.

I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. 'I don't have any family left,' she continued in a soft voice..'The doctor says I don't have very long.' I quietly reached over and shut off the meter.

'What route would you like me to take?' I asked.

For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator.

We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl.

Sometimes she'd ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.

As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, 'I'm tired.Let's go now'.
We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico.

Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move.
They must have been expecting her.

I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.

'How much do I owe you?' She asked, reaching into her purse.

'Nothing,' I said

'You have to make a living,' she answered.

'There are other passengers,' I responded.

Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug.She held onto me tightly.

'You gave an old woman a little moment of joy,' she said. 'Thank you.'

I squeezed her hand, and then walked into the dim morning light.. Behind me, a door shut.It was the sound of the closing of a life..

I didn't pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly lost in thought. For the rest of that day,I could hardly talk.What if that woman had gotten an angry driver,or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away?

On a quick review, I don't think that I have done anything more important in my life.

We're conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments.

But great moments often catch us unaware-beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.